What Kind of Person Are You, Really? (A Self-Reflection Prompt That Surprised Me)
I recently asked a thoughtful question to an unlikely source—ChatGPT, my BFF AI tool I’ve been collaborating with for months. I was curious how well this bot knew me and if it had any insights that would help me grow.
The answer? Surprisingly spot-on. And warmly comforting.
So I’m sharing the exercise—and my own reflections—with you in case you want to try it too.
The Self-Inquiry Prompt
Here’s the exact question I asked:
“Judging by our interactions—what kind of person do you think I am? What qualities do I possess, and what are some of my shadows or misgivings?”
I didn’t want sugarcoating (although ChatGPT does have quite a gentle way of delivering feedback). I wanted honesty.
Here’s What Came Through (And What You Might Learn About Yourself, Too)
1. You Might Be More Aligned Than You Think
The reflection I got was that I’m:
Deeply reflective and emotionally intelligent
Creative and multi-passionate
Rebellious in nature
Value playfulness, especially when things are hard
Grounded and visionary
In other words, ChatGPT’s reflection of who I am is in alignment with the person I believe I am. I was quite surprised to find how clearly my essence came across.
2. Your Shadows Don’t Cancel Your Light
What I appreciated most was the loving honesty. The shadow-side reflections weren’t criticisms. They were patterns I already sensed, but hadn’t fully named:
Sometimes I overthink, loop in self-doubt, or want things to be “perfectly aligned” before I take action.
Resistance to traditional paths = occasional isolation.
I crave depth and authenticity, which makes traditional marketing feel cringe.
I help others be visible, but sometimes resist stepping fully into my own spotlight.
Sound familiar?
If you’re multi-passionate, creative, and heart-led, you probably relate to some of that.
Why This Exercise Is Worth Doing
We don’t often pause to ask how others experience us, and when we do, we usually brace for judgment or rejection. But if you’re asking the right people (those who’ve witnessed your unfolding), their reflection can be healing.
It might affirm your unique gifts.
It might reveal a sneaky self-sabotage pattern.
It might relieve you to know that yes, you really are doing the thing—even if it feels messy or slow.
Try This for Yourself
If you don’t have a BFF bot friend, ask someone who’s witnessed your unfolding the following questions:
What kind of person do you think I am?
What qualities do you see in me?
Are there any patterns or blind spots I might not be aware of?
You can also try journaling your answers first. Then compare.
This isn’t about “fixing” anything. It’s about integrating all the parts of you—your light and your shadows—so you can move forward with more clarity, power, and grace.
Final Thought
Those who are the most self-reflective and self-aware also tend to be the biggest self-critics. While you might not think you are outwardly living your values, being the change you wish to see in the world, or moving mountains, you are likely making a big impact in the smallest of ways. Keep showing up and living your truth, so that those who need to find you most…will.
If you did the exercises, what came up for you? What surprised you? Feel free to write me an email at hello@nicolepaulus.com or share in the comments below.
How to Apply Sliding Scale Pricing with the ASS Model
A housemate of mine is starting a somatic healing business and asked me to look at her offerings/website and give feedback. It is important to her to make sure that her offerings are accessible to anyone who might need it, so very clearly stated in the description of all her offerings that she operates on a sliding scale payment system and then gave a very generous range, 20 Eur per hour to 150 Eur per hour. Clients can decide what to pay her based on their financial situation.
Good idea? Here are my thoughts…
I think it’s GREAT when business owners offer accessibility options when it comes to payment. I myself have taken advantage of such offerings over the years when going through moments of financial instability - so I am in no way discouraging this practice. But…I also know that healers especially tend to undersell and devalue themselves. They want to help people so much and reach as many people as possible that they will literally give their offerings away even when it’s a financial burden to do so. But here is the thing you have to remember, Conscious Business Owners have bills too! And with the rising cost of living, it’s becoming even more important to figure out a fair pricing model, one that keeps YOUR bills paid and also promotes accessibility. Otherwise, you risk burning yourself out or going out of business, which is not good for anyone. And offering a very steep discount can actually backfire in the long run when building your brand because it will cause doubt in those who actually can afford to pay a higher rate. They will ASSume that you aren’t really good at what you do and spend their money elsewhere.
Here’s What To Do Instead
Instead of giving anyone and everyone the ability to choose how much they pay for your services, I recommend applying the Assigned Sliding Scale Model. With the ASS model (I can’t make this shit up — HAHA!) you determine the revenue you need to generate per day, week, or month, and then create assigned slots that ensure that you will be compensated fairly. So if you are a massage therapist and you determine that you need to charge €100 a session to keep the lights on and your family fed, then you can offer 1-€100 sessions per day, 1-€50 session per day, and 1-€150 session per day, for example. Once those slots are full, they’re full. You can use this pricing model as marketing, and say something like: “When you book a €150 session, you are supporting access to services to those who may have a hard time accessing these services otherwise.” If you are an advocate for a certain marginalized group (women, trans folks, or BIPOC, etc.) you can clearly state that your discounted rate is specifically for them. This works especially well if you host events, workshops, or teachings.
The more transparent you are about WHY you are offering an assigned sliding scale the more likely your clients will rally with you in a social-justice-minded private practice.
So there you have it - a fair way to offer sliding scale pricing while also ensuring that your lights stay on and you can feed yourself and your family!
Have you used the ASS model in your business? How did it work out for you? Let me know!
Here's Why You Need KPIs In Your Life
Today’s blog is all about KPIs.
KP - WHAT?
KPIs or Key Performance Indicators
What are KPIs and why are they important?
Well, I’m glad you asked. KPIs can help you track how well your marketing efforts are performing. Without them, it’s kind of like throwing money and time down the drain. You wouldn’t want to do that, would you?
Now I’m going to be honest. I’ve been in business for 10+ years and I haven’t done a very good job of updating my KPIs consistently for myself. But that’s all about to change. Today I am going to set up my spreadsheet and over the course of the months, start sharing the process with you all. Why? Because I want to start practicing what I preach. And also because I have been testing out a new beta coaching program where I act as an accountability coach for Conscious Business Owners. For three months, I help CBOs outline a content marketing strategy and then meet with them bi-monthly to see what progress they’ve made. One of the best ways to see if their content marketing efforts are actually working is if CBOs keep track of their KPIs.
Which is why I thought it’d be a great time to start implementing my own KPI tracking efforts.
Though I haven’t always done a good job of keeping my own KPIs in order, I do keep track of them on behalf of clients.
Not only does this help my clients see the value I am bringing them but it also allows us to make more informed decisions about where we spend time and effort in the business. It also helps me shape future content because I can see what kinds of topics are resonating with people, for example.
Have I convinced you to set up your own KPIs, yet?
Maybe you’re wondering which KPIs you should be tracking…well, unfortunately, that answer will be unique to the individual depending on where you are currently spending your marketing efforts. If your business follows more of a content marketing approach, I would recommend tracking some or all of the following:
Blog: # of monthly blog posts + # of views
Social media: # of <insert the social media channel or channels you use most here> posts, # of impressions or engagements, # of likes, kind of post (ex. poll, question, quote,)
Podcast: # of podcasts that went live, # of downloads (Apple), # of views on website,
Leads: # of organic leads (how many people contacted you ), how new clients are finding you, # of introductory calls, # of leads that came in from your lead magnet
Now don’t think for one second that this KPI document has to be elaborate. It can literally be a text document to start out or a simple spreadsheet on Google Sheets. No one else even has to see the damn thing. The main point here is that you begin updating it once a month and then use the document to inform your decisions moving forward. There is also an added bonus that comes with establishing a KPI practice…you’ll start seeing that showing up consistently actually produces results. This is KEY to growing your business organically.
Ready to set up your own KPIs but not sure where to start? Reach out and let’s set up a 30-minute free discovery call where I’ll give you some pointers.
How to Feel Richer Than Any of the Kardashians Combined
This week was a wild ride.
I found out an old coworker of mine passed away from cancer. He was a young father of two little girls and had been battling stage 4 cancer for a few years.
That a neighbor of ours had a stroke on the way to the supermarket.
That my aunt’s husband passed away from a heart attack. He started feeling symptoms at his son’s wedding but didn’t want to disturb the ceremony.
On a lighter note, I also found out that my younger sister, who is graduating from high school with honors soon, received a scholarship to attend my alma mater. I sent her some money with a note attached that read the following:
Congratulations on your BIG achievement. I am SO proud of you and can't wait to see what amazing things you do for the world!! If I could offer one piece of advice it would be this: TRAVEL as often as you can!! - see the world, taste different foods, immerse yourself in other cultures, attempt to talk to locals even when you don't speak the same language, and try to stay in one place for a while if you can (at least a few weeks) so you really feel what it's like to live there. If you follow this advice - your life will always be rich (even if you aren't haha). I love you so very much!!
While I stand behind my message, the truth is, I needed this reminder myself because sometimes I feel like I am behind financially to my childhood friends, many of whom own their own houses and have stable jobs with good pensions. Sometimes I feel like I’m not working hard enough - like I should be doing something more productive with my time than practicing ukulele or playing beach volleyball. Some of my friends are new moms and swear they are in love with their little humans. I believe them, but again, it makes me question my own life choices. Should I start a family and finally put down roots somewhere?
But then I hear devastating news like the first few points I listed in the beginning and I am reminded of the fragility of life. Life is too short to compare yourself to others. Or to try to live a life that makes others proud. Instead, we should all be living life to its fullest in every way possible, in whatever way works for us. For some, that means bringing new humans into the world or devoting your life to a project or passion. For others, like me, that means traveling the world and experiencing the beauty of the world firsthand.
And that’s exactly what I am doing.
Case in point - I am currently clacking away on my laptop in Crete. Every day that we’ve been here, my partner and I have either been working out together on the balcony that overlooks the sea, climbing steep mountains while the rocky earth crunches beneath our boots, eating locally grown vegetables doused in olive oil, or alternating between bathing in the salty sea and warm sun.
Now the time here hasn’t all been dolmades and yogurt. I am apparently allergic to olive trees which happen to be blooming right now - which causes my eyes to itch and nose to consistently feel like a loaded canon. Our Airbnb has had many water-related issues, no hot water sometimes, no water at all at other times, and today, well today, water was shooting out of the wall of the bathroom sink. And yesterday I ate chicken souvlaki that may or may not have been a leather handbag.
But as annoying as these things are at the moment, I wake up every day grateful for the life I’ve created and for the people I’ve helped in the process.
Though I may not be a homeowner or have an impressive retirement plan, I LOVE my life. And that’s what being a CBO is all about - not becoming the next influencer, selling millions of memberships to your coaching program, or getting on the bestseller list. It’s about living your life, your one precious life, to the fullest so that you can inspire others to do the same.
And that, my friend, is the secret to feeling richer than any of the Kardashians combined.
What the F is a Conscious Business Owner?
If you’ve landed on my site you may have seen the phrase “Conscious Business Owner” being slung around. And then you may have had one of two thoughts:
“Nice, that’s me!”
or
“Well, what the hell does that mean?”
This blog post is for the folks who find themselves in the second category.
To me, a Conscious Business Owner is someone who resonates with any or all of the following statements:
I care about the environment and think often about whether or not my business is negatively impacting Mama Earth.
My business has a goal or purpose beyond just making fat stacks of money.
I have a passion for helping others help themselves.
I am a healer, yoga instructor, therapist, non-profit founder, artist, musician, social entrepreneur and want to share my gifts with the world.
I only want to connect with clients and customers whose lives will be positively impacted by my products or services.
I know that before I can help anyone else, I must first help myself, that’s why I have self-care rituals in place that help me get re-centered and aligned.
I consider myself a servant leader, putting the people involved in my business first - above everything else.
I only want my business to grow if it’s done organically and authentically.
Now by no means is this list exhaustive. I’m sure I will think of other things to add as time goes on, but for now, I hope it helps you better understand what to expect when working with me because I now consider myself a bona fide CBO.
I’m going to be honest with you though, I’ve been in business for over ten years and I would say for most of those years I was not a CBO. I put my profits over my values. I worked with clients that did not align with my vision for the world. My reasoning was that I had to eat. But that’s no longer an excuse. The world needs us all to be aligned for that is the only way to really create lasting change. And alignment for me meant narrowing my niche to CBOs!
A few years ago, I thought I had to co-found a non-profit to make an impact. I didn’t think website building and digital marketing was a valuable contribution to the world. Oh, how wrong I was! After that tanked, I realized that there were a ton of healers, changemakers, and CBOs out there who needed help growing their business and that I had the skills to help them make an even bigger impact. This was my gift and I was ready to share it with the world, mindfully and organically. Thanks for being patient as I learn to navigate this new direction.